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Europe is probably the world’s best retreat if getting down right silly for your ski holiday tops your To-Do list. Not only does Europe house some of the world’s longest ski runs, it also boasts several hundred large and small resorts that cater to everyone from nudist to purist, to wackos and hippies. I’ve compiled a list here to bring you some of the brainless, mindless and thoughtless things you might want to do this ski season. Not all are crazy but some are downright boneheaded and irrationally reckless—if this sounds like you, I invite you to read on you witless warrior.

Skiing Downhill, Fast:

If you want to try your hands at one of Europe’s steepest slopes, then you don’t have to look much farther than Austria, Mayrhofen(Zillertal) to be exact. The Harakiki slope angles at almost 80% or 40º, which creates enough speed to make even the slightest turns dangerous and mind boggling. Though there are some longer slopes for sure, Harakiki makes you feel like gravity has let go and human-powered flight on skis is possible.

Skiing Nude, Frozen:

If you’ve ever thought of disrobing just for the sake of it while on the slope, you’re not the only one. In fact, there’s a cross-country ski route in Austria—Obertaun (Obertauern) to be exact—where nude skiers are welcomed and invited to ski (sticking to the route) while in the buff. There are more resorts where skiing in your birthday suit suits the local authorities, but I’ll have more on that in my upcoming blogs. If you don’t mind snowburns, sunburns and shriveled (very tender) tissues to be showed off, then Obertauern, Austria, should make your dreams of “in the buff,” “bare,” or “buck-naked” come true.

Skiing Gambler, Broke:

If you like to gamble away little Susie’s college fund, then you should stay away from Les 2 Alpes in France this January (10th – 17th). It’s the first of many annual Poker Week celebrations where you can come, put your best Poker Face on, bluff like hell and either win buckets of Euros (drug dealers currency of choice over the flailing dollar these days) or go home bankrupt. Just make sure to pay your bills back home, pre-pay for the hotel room and little Susie’s ski lessons and let the gambling begin. Lay your best hand down for the best Poker Party this winter in Europe.

Skiing Night, Lost:

It’s not likely you’ll get lost if you try night skiing in Europe this year. There are loads of ski resorts that flick on the power to illuminate the slopes for all you night owls. Though the slopes might be frozen or even packed down from day skiers, night skiing has its advantages. Places like the Dolomiti Superski area in Italy, Saint Bernard in Switzerland and Maribor in Slovenia all gloat about their fantastic night skiing and venues. Before hitting the sack, be sure to hit the slopes on your next ski holiday. I find that though the slopes are not as well groomed, they are way less crowded and seemingly more dangerous. An easy intermediate suddenly becomes a treacherous black after the sun sets.